Bloomin gadgets...
OK, OK. So I am not a techie person. Why doesn't anything work as easily as they say it will? Bloomin Wintv will not work on my laptop - but there is no-one around who will lead me kindly through all the gubbins to tell me why.
GRRRRRRRR.

That word will never be the same again!
Why is that other people's accents change words irretrievably? I now go week at the knees when anyone says this one utilitarian word - selotape.
Last Thursday the 'girls' from school went on an outing to Bridgemere. I have not been there for years - about 6 years. However, they were holding a French market, a barbeque demonstration and there was a jazz band playing there. Sounds good?
Well, the drive over was so full of memories of places that I had stopped at with my 'best firend' - buying antique things, not so antique things, in fact it should just have been 'buying'. Then there were the tea places and the occasional pub we had a meal in, or knew who the landlord was etc etc. So, I was driving - literally, down memory lane.
Then at Bridgemere the plants were as brilliant as I remember them, the jazz was perky, encouragingly the people selling barbequed food burnt it as much as I do. (So I see no need to pay hundreds on a machine that I can't store, takes an age to heat up and then is in effect just a flame thrower at food. Sad old git that I am!)
But, here is that wonderful word, but... the French market was full of the sexiest men selling pottery, cheese, wine, cider etc. I stood in the middle of one of the tents and just laughed, what a treat! I managed to remember, fleetingly, that I have political objections to buying anything French at the moment, then turfed that out of the window, bought a traditional Marmite Pot that I have always wanted and never managed to get, a samll lasagne dish, so that I don't cook and eat double quantities, then came the orgasmic moment when the gentleman declared he needed to selotape the lid to the maain dish.
Well, my knees liquified....oooooooooooooh. What a treat!! I can't express it in writing - it was the second syllable that did for me, and my knees are still jellified. After that the cheese man did the same thing! Now is there a French tactic with this word, do they know how effective it is to use selotape in England? My goodness, I have to tidy my house today and I shall have Edif Piaf blasting out and a Mantra, a solitary word repeatedly running through my mind, but NOT spoken out loud.
Happiness is -

Planning ahead...
What do you do before you go on holiday? Do you ask around your friends for good tips, places to go, things to do?
I did, and this is what I am not going to do - for obvious reasons.
1. Pee over the Grand Canyon
2. Pee over the bay to Alcatraz
Thanks DLG for the tips, there is absolutely no chance that I am going to try to rival P... in this!

Yipppeeee!
Yes! Yes! Yes! I have finished the reports! They take an age to do and I am not sure that most parents want what we have to write now. However, they are done for another year.
So today, I can clean my car - it is covered with flower parts of the sycamore tree that grows opposite my little house. Then I am going to chuck out the accumulated piles of papers, tins etc that I keep to recycle, so watch out the banks in Newport, I shall be there later to fill you! Then my garden is number one on the list for attention, the fruit trees need their summer pruning - and let me not boast too soon, there are plums, apples, red currants and cherries growing away there. The leaf mould must be put down as a mulch for them and I need to start regular watering. I am so looking forward to this, as I have sadly neglected it all since November. However, I shall get it all in trim over the next few weeks and enjoy the work.
Happiness is having finished all the paperwork that weighs so heavily.

There's nothing quite like it!

British summer time - in fact we are very close to Midsummer Day, so this morning, my first really free time was going to be spent in the garden. Hmmmph!
5.30 a.m. was beautiful, 8.00 saw heavy rain, so I decided to go and do the shopping. On my return I drove through a hail storm that turned everything white - about half an inch of the stuff in just a minute or two! Two days ago the temperature was up in the 30s. Today we have a white over... So. what I want to know is, when 'they' talk about global warming, do they mean global freezing in the summer and globally tepid in the winter?
Answers please on a postcard to:
Confused of Shropshire.

Bliss.
There is nothing quite like standing outside in your garden at dusk, breathing in deeply and being assaulted by the scents of plants like the Phildephus. It is just coming out at the moment and wafts hit me wherever I am. Last night I actually remembered to lock up before going to bed and was almost intoxicated by it.
That makes reaction times slower when you duck as the bats zoom past - its lovely to have them around again. I keep meaning to put up a bat box somewhere in the garden, perhaps this year I will actually get around to it. Meanwhile I shall exercise my lungs, take out a glass of wine to add to the sensory pleasures and in 10 reports time, a book as well.

Who's a lucky girl then?
All of you with young children - there's hope at the end of the tunnel!! Honest, they grow up....
My son and his girlfriend came to visit me yesterday and brought me the most lovely present.MMmmmm. She used to be a perfume buyer for a large firm and had a box of D&G goodies for me - perfume, the body cream, the perfume milk stuff, soap and bath milk. And its all in a luxurious red box - HUGE!!! I have never before been given such a wonderful present of perfume, so I am feeling very spoilt.
So when I have written the next block of five reports I am going to treat myself to a D&G shower, some perfume and then go shop in the local farm shop, not quite the right occasion, but I will feel wonderful.

Have a drink on me.....
So all my pessimism was ill founded, I have been offered the job that I am presently doing on a permanent contract. This might not sound like much, but to me it is incredibly important and exciting. I shall feel far better about stating my case when it comes to the organisation of things. Great!
Now where is the gin bottle and the tin of olives?

Ooooh, I've got a new gizmo!
I am getting brave, as well as trying to get my class more techie, I am having to push my own boundaries further all the time. This week I am going to try out a video capture thingy so that I can show videos on my Interactive whiteboard instead of having to book the hall. I'll let you know how it works!

It's the end of our half term, I have done a lot of the things on the list but not all. However, I am going to have a day off from compost heaps, piles of paper and the threat of writing my presentation and 29 4 page reports. Those will be done next week. Meanwhile there is a lovely goldfinch feeding off the insects in teh wall outside my little study, the spotted flycatchers are back and I saw a black cap and a grey wagtail(the one with the yellow breast) at Chatsworth - lovely! Have a good day everyone.

Ooooh, quite pleased with these!

Even though I say it myself, I am pleased with the pickies from Chatsworth. First the house, taken from the cricket pitch - and from where else I ask you!! Not just any old pitch either, the pavilion is the sweetest little thatched cottage, and with a view like this I defy anyone to be bored. Apparently the Duke would sit under the tree and watch the whole match. Well I hope there is cricket in Heaven for him because he seemed to be a man with a wonderful sense of humour.



The laburnum walk was lovely!!



Then this - I am going to go back in the summer with shorts on and walk up this myself!!



A picnic basket at the top with cold champagne and sinful sandwiches would top it off wonderfully.

Oh dear, - and I thought I was getting my act together.
I was looking forward to visiting Chatsworth today with a very good cricketing friend. Lunch, house, grounds and the cricket pitch. Well, all I can say is that my brain is not yet sorted out after the last six months. (I can just hear my mother muttering, "Don't you blame me!!")
At about half past one John rang me to ask where I was. .... Yes, I was working at home, sorting everything out so the day could be guilt free _ no feelings of "I haven't done this or that etc." How many times can I get things wrong?
Well, I shot off to Derbyshire, had two near misses, but got there in the end. He was understandably rather miffed, but we had a lovely shortened trip around the gardens and sorted out my sillinesses. He was the one friend who contacted me weekly when I went through the pain of separation from my family, he has also been extremely thoughtful over my mother's death. Sod's Law dictates that I upset my friends most.
I am apologising into the ether here and hope that somehow this works. And that is pretty stupid too, so I'll put the spade away and stop digging!
I'll post the pickies later.

This does not bode well.
Whilst on a walking holiday in the south of France, I was introduced to the humour of Chinese proverbs. One woman had the knack of choosing the exact moment to tell an apt saying - just as I was about to give up on a particularly steep part of the walk, the fit people were way ahead and resting, I was looking up at the precipitous track when she quoted, "Man who take woman on slope, not on the level." I defy anyone not to fall about laughing and be totally unable to walk for at least 5 minute; exhaustion heightens my sense of the ridiculous - I always picture the set up of proverbs...... At least I finally turned up laughing, with tears running down my face, but happy. The rest of the group were left in ignorance because it was better to keep them guessing!
Well, I am reading "The Public Confessions of a Middle Aged Woman" by Sue Townsend and she quotes:
"Beware the occasions that demand new clothes." I rest my case.

Which are you?
Do you normally work in silence, or do you like music or background noise to work to?
I always work in silence at home, I can't bear any noise, I even get super sensitive about squeaks and have to go and sort them out. Woe betide any tap that drips!!
So why is it that whenever I go to my haridressers (I think I like that word... its going to be added to my murdered word/phrase list) I take some work and the writing just flows. The words appear in my mind easily - no dredger needed there, and I can plan the whole piece of writing without agony. Is it the mish mash of background noise as well as the music? Or is the relaxation induced by the thought I can only look better in an hour's time!!
Today's hairdo saw me write my presentation for the job interview, then I found a dress to wear to it.
Now, can I get the job?

Are you ready to do the same thing?

Right, it has rained overnight so its cool in the garden, wet underfoot, but the air has that incredible clean feel as you breath it in.

Imagine standing over the lily plants and wallowing in that perfume - it is an gardening orgasmic experience for me. I look forward to these flowering every year and spread them into different parts of the garden each summer. I might even plant a row in the veg patch for cutting for the house. Now that would be TLC!






I can hear you muttering something about whitecoats and men taking me away - but oh, this is worth it!!!!